|September 2012 HRD's Sirens VS. Brawlers|
No, I don't want to go to practice. Well, not today. I think everyone would be lying if they said that every time they were more eager than the last. I didn't want to go today. I was tired from work and wanted to prepare for my kid's first day of fourth grade and sneak a beer in as well but I went. My attendance is sometimes on and sometimes borderline. It all depends on life. Then when my teammates arrived for carpool I was informed we also had B travel team practice after league practice as well and that began to further annoy me.
Good thing that with my car ride conversation and dabbles in gossip and perverse innuendo I got into a much better mood quickly. Scrimmage was pretty fun. We had a mix of some rec girls in with us tonight. I like when they are there. I feel like it's really important to set a good example for them and show them how the game should be played. Given, I am one of the more vulgar ladies on the track who is flipping the bird and swearing up a storm. I still do not to let that compromise my mental state in a game. I play cool, collected, and rarely lose my sense of "this is supposed to be fun" during a game. My team taught me that. Aside of yelling from the bench during a power jam I'm pretty stable I would like to think though I am sure some would differ. Fuck'em.
We all have lives outside of derby. Some of us have kids, girlfriends, husbands, careers... And that can really take a lot out of you. Then you have derby. The virus. There is no cure but quitting. You have 3+ practices a week for 2+ hours each time not to mention the endless fundraisers and events that basically support our entire existence. It's a lot! But we do it any way. So, why do you do it? It's not always fun, convenient, or easy. There is something about it you can't seem to stray away from. Is it the work-outs? The pure love of the sport itself? The sisterhood you find yourself consumed by? Or the simple fact that you are part of something bigger than yourself? I know for me exactly what it was and still is. I always wanted to be someone. I had friends who were teachers, artists, musicians, contractors... but what was I? Nothing. I was just Jas and being just Jas wasn't good enough. Now, when I look in the mirror I am proud of who I see. I am proud to see the person who makes sacrifices to do the thing she loves, who gets up despite being knocked down numerous times, and is willing and eager to share her love with others. I may bitch and whine about all the time and commitment but on bout day when the crowd is going wild and you step out with your team every practice is worth it. You are part of something bigger than yourself and you share this same love with thousands all over the world. How fucking lucky are we? So, go to practice and bitch in car on the way there.